The SAHM-Mobile

posted by Momo Fali on October 5, 2007

I just dropped off my son at preschool. Well, not so much dropped him off as pulled in, waited for a retired fellow in an orange vest to direct me to a parking spot, and walked 40 yards into the school with an eager five year old, a school bag, and a snack bucket big enough to hold snacks for 20 kids and three teachers. You should see the parents with more than one kid. When my daughter was in preschool I was one of them. Holding a big infant carrier, along with all the other stuff, was quite a balancing act.

Actually, I could just drop him off. They have teachers and parent volunteers in a “drop off zone” where parents can pull up and someone will open the door, reach in and unbuckle your kid, then send him or her into school. It’s not that I don’t think my son could manage getting to his classroom unassisted; it’s that I don’t want anyone to see the inside of my car.

Not only is there the typical Cheerio assortment all over the floor, but there is an accumulation of various crumbs inside my son’s seat. I can clean it out, but those crumbs are back within a couple of days. It’s like they multiply on their own or something.

There is also a black stain on the rug, but I don’t know where it came from. And, there is a sticky substance just inside the door…the door those volunteers would have to open to get my son out. I can NOT de-stickify the spot either. I’ve tried everything, but it remains tacky nonetheless. And, I can’t forget the time my husband saw something on the floor and leaned down to smell it, only to find out it was pee. Either my son is extremely flexible, or someone snuck out of their car seat without me knowing.

A quick glance in my back seat will reveal small tissue paper squares, and green pipe cleaners. They’re just lying on the seat in case one of us gets the urge to make a paper flower. There is also a soccer ball, a styrofoam star covered with glitter, a broken umbrella, various happy meal toys, and a maraca.

Paper flowers, a glittery star, and a maraca…I could throw a fiesta! I’m sure if I just looked hard enough, I could find myself a burrito.

    Comments

  • Josi


    LOL–for a minute I thought you were going to say you don’t drop him off because you want those extra few, special, moments with his hand in yours. I was thinking “Oh crap, guilt trip coming” since that’s not me at all. By the end I was laughing my head off. We are frighteningly similar! Bueno!

  • Erica


    I hear you sister!!! I mourned the loss of the car seats this year (Levi is now 6) if only because it means I have to take my turn driving to lunch with my co-workers (I used to beg off because of said car seat). And that means 8 hours of power washing and deoderizing, only to then act like the car is still messy when they get in. What is wrong with me?

  • Avery Gray


    Just embrace the mess. That’s what I do, and I’m much happier for it! ;o)

  • melody is slurping life


    Oh come on, drive thru, drop him off…your car sounds just like every other mom’s. 🙂

  • Blue Momma


    Are you describing your car or mine?

    My BIL has said that my gift this Christmas is going to be a car cleaning.

    I’m happy in my crap, though. Like Avery Gray up there said, embrace the mess. And I certainly do!!!

  • Shauna Loves Chocolate


    If your car doesn’t look like this… it means you aren’t toting your kids around.

  • Susan S.


    I too thought this was going to be an “extra-special moments” post, only to get a huge chuckle at the car description… Truly – this just shows you’re a Mom! My car rarely has extra passengers because that would require shoveling the matchbox and assorted other cars and trucks off of the other seats.

  • Candace


    too funny! everyone at my daughter’s school has clean cars. don’t trust any of em’..
    mine is BEYOND shameful. Yours sounds positively pristine in comparison.

  • terancedubya


    You’ve got it hard. Then again my little one is no where near school age…yet. One thing though. My car likes to eat my daughter’s shoes. My daughter will reach down and pull off both of her shoes during a car ride and toss them around. Then when I clean the car, I only find one. My daughter has 4 pairs of shoes w/o pairs. What the hell is that? You ever see that dad at the grocery store whose kid only has one shoe on? You’re looking at me.

  • Dedee


    Last time I cleaned out my car, I found the remains of burgers and fries and nuggets. I give my kids the bag and tell them to put the garbage in, but apparently not. I shudder to think what has accumulated since. I love kids.

  • K. Darrell


    I got news for you. The car seat doesn’t get any better as they get older. LOL

  • Jenny up the hill


    You know, really…all those people with perfectly clean cars are just not prepared for life! I mean, I’m sure that I would have been able to use that petrified McDonald’s hamburger for something…lol! My van is a complete and total dump all the time…I try, but I never get control! lol!

  • Joeprah


    Strawberry milkshake spill is both uncleanable for mortal humans and is an afront to the senses as it sours and molds. My mini-van perhaps may at least be tied with your vehicle, if not way worse.

  • Annette Lyon


    Story of my life. I’m so glad mine isn’t the only car like that. I DO try, but like you said, the stuff reproduces on its own. Granted, I haven’t tried cleaning up the dried on Go-Gurt yet . . .

  • newnorth


    hahahah. This reminds me, I need to clean out my car!

  • Brandi H.


    i actually found mold growing on the carpet in my backseat. literally growing, like a little forest. this was on my son’s first day at preschool, immediately AFTER pulling through the drop-off lane. i didn’t really think through the whole “strange school-type adult in my car” scenario. i went straight to the car wash. i wonder if they noticed an overwhelming aroma of lysol when i picked him up that afternoon. too little, too late.

    have you seen the “mom my ride” video? i can’t get it to work on youtube right now, but try this site:
    http://www.brightcove.tv/title.jsp?title=791890380&channel=8017. pretty funny.

  • Waitingonyou2


    “Goo Gone” will get that sticky substance gone and if you get the one with the orange essence it will mask any foul smell that may be related to or near the spot!

  • Heather.PNR


    The sad thing is, even when I try to clean up our car now it still looks dirty. The kid crud is permanent!

  • Dede


    Well I had that problem also, except at our school you couldn’t park and walk them in you had to drive through. The nice lady that let my son out would just pick up the trash that fell out and put it back in the car. I tried to get it clean, it just never worked. LOL. So if you don’t have trash falling out your doing good.

  • Becky


    My car is worse than yours! I think I will write up a post about all the things I find on Wedneday when I clean it out!

    Leave a Comment

    Your email is never shared.
    Required fields are marked *