There comes a point as an insomniac where you learn to live with a lack of sleep. You become accustomed to needing a cup of coffee to get you through the afternoon, but not before you have tried drinking tea because everyone who knows anything about insomnia knows you shouldn’t drink coffee in the middle of the day. I digress.
I digress because I’m typing this at such a level of exhaustion that my brain convinced me (albeit for a split second, but still…) that maybe I could prop my eyelids open with toothpicks. I also briefly considered creating my own Red Bull eyedrops.
Since Tuesday (it’s Sunday night now…I think it’s Sunday), I have slept a total of 19 hours. That’s 19 hours in five nights if my mind is working right, which it isn’t. All I know is that it’s less than four resting hours a day if you average it, and you have no idea how long it took me to do that math.
Once upon a time, I used to climb in bed at 10:00 p.m., fall asleep within a minute, and stay that way until 6:45 a.m. Almost nine blissful hours of sleep every night. That was before kids. That was when my only responsibility was me.
Seeing as how my responsibilities have greatly increased, I have learned to live a slumberless life. A life in which I stumble about like a drunk half the time. It’s not easy, but I manage. It is one of many sacrifices that I’ve made as a parent, and because I love my kids my zombie-like state is worth it.
But seriously, where did I put those toothpicks?