Cheese Puffs

posted by Momo Fali on March 9, 2009

Last week, we were playing a board game together as a family when my husband blocked our six year old son’s next move. Our boy saw his dad’s defensive strategy and proclaimed, “Damn it, Daddy!”

He didn’t realize he had said anything wrong, so we explained that it was bad, and he need not ever say it again. We didn’t need to ask him where he learned it. We knew he had picked it up while playing games with his dad. My husband’s competitive nature has also been responsible for teaching our son the words, “sucker” and “crap”.

My husband, the sailor, also taught our daughter her first curse word. When she was about two years old we were driving in the car when, out-of-the-blue, we heard the “F” word come from the back seat. Before we had a chance to stop her, she had said it about ten times in a row. At least she used it in the proper venue. Clearly, she had heard that while driving in the car with her dad.

But, I can not blame my husband for the time my daughter did not fling curse words, but instead assaulted us with attitude.

I was extremely hormonal tired, and had been working all day while my husband played with our daughter, who was just a toddler at the time. They sat down to have a snack together as I flopped my exhausted body onto the couch. No sooner had I sat down, than my daughter asked, “Mom, can you get us some napkins?”

Irritated that she asked me, instead of her father, I angrily said, “Oh, sure! Dad’s been playing all day while I’ve been working, but I’ll get up to get the FREAKING napkins!”

I returned to the room and tossed them a couple of paper towels before falling back into my seat.

Then I watched as my daughter climbed onto her dad’s lap and put her face a mere inch from his. She held that position as she stuck her hand into their snack bag, then glared at him and yelled, “Dad! These are FREAKING cheese puffs!”

But all things considered, I don’t think my “F” word is nearly as bad as his.

    Comments

  • Always Home and Uncool


    All is cool as long as the F-word remains an adjective. When it’s used as a verb, then you’re in a heap of trouble.

  • Rhea


    ROFL That’s hilarious. And I think it’s the same in our house. I teach attitude, husband teaches bad words, unfortunately.

  • Mrs. Schmitty


    Oh yea, I feel your pain. Last night my daughter was fighting going to bed. I got the hand on the hip, head tossing back and forth attitude. Then in her room, we heard her call her father a dumbass.

    nice, huh?

  • Comedy Goddess


    They are little recorders aren’t they? I taught my daughter to say “Mommy is always right. And always pretty.” She out grew it, but it was very comforting when she was little.

  • WeaselMomma


    Excellent!

  • Mama Dawg


    Not even close!

  • FrankandMary


    My Father was born in Italy, hence Italian curse words. They sound so romantic really that whenever I repeated them people would say, “Oh, look, the littler girl can speak Italian! Isn’t that swwwweeetttt?”
    Oh yeah. It was sweet. ~Mary

  • James


    Funny! I have to be extra careful right now as it is my most vulnerable time. Lukas is starting to be able to repeat any word we say, and I am not sure I have properly prepared by watching the more seemingly benign curse words like crap and dammit.

    Thanks for the reminder.

  • Maureen


    Ahahahaha! That was FREAKING funny!

  • NUGO


    last year my 7-yr-old said "i know what the f-word is?"
    shock & awe.
    "what is it?" we say.
    "well i can't say it but it rhymes with truck."
    always a fun moment for parents when they find out their kids can cuss too.
    FREAKIN' good post!

  • Colleen - Mommy Always Wins


    I don’t care who ya are, that’s cute raaaht there! 😉

  • Mark


    They hear and see everything, their mind is a sponge! We teach them weather we intend to or not.

  • Captain Dumbass


    I think I would have literally peed my pants if I’d seen that.

  • Heather


    I’ll never forget the first time my daughter said sh*t. I laughed, my mom got mad, and she’s the one that always said it.

  • Kat


    KiKi said “Sonofabitch” in while my best friend and I were driving. She and I looked at each other both wondering if we had just heard that come out of my sweet 2 year olds mouth.

    PS. Your F word, harmless compared to his.

  • Tom


    Deplorable as it is, it’s almost impossible not to bust out laughing when a kid picks up a word like that and tries it on.

  • Tara R.


    My boy has ratted me out many times. I definitely have the potty mouth in our family.

  • meleah rebeccah


    Oh Boy. I will never forget the day my son dropped the F-BOMB I was never so mortified in my life. And I had nobody to blame but myself.

    Thankfully your son said it behind closed doors!

  • O My Blog!


    I’m so glad she cleared that up because I always thought they were ‘flippin’ chese puffs’. I am so embarrassed, I have been wrong this whole time…
    *snicker*

  • Shelli wishes it was Mrs. Burchett;)


    My 6yo son loves to tell on his 4yo sister…

    Owen: “Mommy! Ella said the bad butt word!”

    Ella: “I did not say the bad butt word! I said the donkey word!”

    *smacks forehead*

  • imsilentnomore


    Reminds me of the time I was in the van with my son, he was 4 at the time. We don’t like for the kids to use the word stupid. DS had called his sister stupid. I gave him a stern reminder that we don’t use that word.

    A few minutes later I hear ever so quietly from the seat behind me, “stupid”

    Needless to say we had a more in depth conversation about saying words mom tells you not to say.

  • Josi


    I remember when my little brother was four, and he knocked on the bathroom door while my mom was in there. She said ‘just a minute’ and he said “Get the hell out of there, I need to go!” Well, she got out fast all right, and little brother learned just how wrong that word was to use, especially toward his mom.

  • Twenty Four At Heart


    Kids are like sponges. I’m so glad you write all of your stories down to share with us!

  • Bean


    I knew the instant I saw the title!

  • Dapoppins


    Why is your life so funny. Come to my home and teach me how to make life this funny!

  • Ed


    Funny–in our house it’s my wife that uses all of the colorful language. Oh, I use it too. I’m just a bit more careful and always under my breath. We’ve been lucky so far–no big ones from the kids.

  • newnorth


    not even near nearly 🙂

  • Heather


    I cannot WAIT to have kids like yours. Seriously. Although, I think I will LMAO and not be able to explain why it’s bad. I’m the definite potty mouth around here. 😉

  • Bee and Rose


    I love that story! That’s right, they are the freaking cheese puffs! You’ll be calling them that for years! lol!

  • the planet of janet


    at this point, my kids are teaching ME the bad words….

  • Ursula


    I’m waiting for my little guy to start dropping the F bomb like a WWII fighter plane like his father-the F Baron.

    I remember back in the day babysitting my then roommates 3 nephews so she and her sister could have a spa day. They were 3, 5 and 7 at the time I believe and the oldest honed his F bomb skillz. He often honed them on his middle brother-the one with the speech impediment.

    They were playing in the pop up tent I pitched in our dining room while I was in the kitchen making lunch when middle brother comes in to announce that his older brother (remember he had a speech imediment at the time) “Said Duckin!”

    Said older brother storms in to renounce his brothers decree by announcing that he “didn’t say F’in!”

    I’m nearly doubled over in pain at this battle of wills, tattler revenge unfolding in front of my eyes when the little one-at the wee age of three strolls into the kitchen and asks, “Who said F’in?”

    I had to shoo them out of the room, go into the bathroom and laugh hysterically into a pile of towels.

    Gotta love it. Can’t wait to tell their future girlfriends that story.

  • DysFUNctional Mom


    At least she said it properly. One of my favorite memories is my sweet 3 year old princess saying “Oh my SH*T!!!!”

  • NukeDad


    I take it she’d rather have had the crunchy Cheetos?

  • Debbie


    Why do they always learn the bad stuff from us but not the good?

  • Ashley


    lol but he can’t prove she even learned that from you…right?

  • LiteralDan


    Personally, I’ve been amazed at my own restraint in not teaching the kids any bad words yet, but my wife definitely has a problem choosing her words around the kids.

    We miraculously haven’t heard any back from them yet, but now that my daughter’s (a very verbally advanced) two, it’s clearly a threat.

    Just yesterday, she was sitting in the back seat softly playing with the melodious sounds of “dam-MIT, dam-MIT” in her innocent voice. I expect to hear a lot worse one of those times she’s screaming at us for something or other.

  • Single Parent Dad


    Agreed.

    I have fallen foul a few times, but my son is now at the stage of correcting me, when I use the words ‘stupid’ or ‘hate’ ones I banned use of.