Random Realizations III

posted by Momo Fali on July 22, 2009

1. If your son decides to eat some fruit, make sure he doesn’t leave 1/4 of a watermelon sitting out where your puppy can eat it…rind and all.

2. When you are driving a car to Chicago that is on loan from a very nice company (Hi Chevy!) you may want to make sure you know where the windshield wipers are before you go driving in the rain.

3. And, when removing a very heavy, rear seat from said car, make sure you don’t let it swing down and hit you in the ovary.

4. The summer breeze through the screen door isn’t quite as bug-free if your five month old, 50 pound puppy goes right through it to get to the mailman.

5. Ironing on a humid day is not fun.

6. No matter how prepared you are for a trip out of town to meet a thousand people, you will never be prepared for the zit you’ll get. In your eyebrow.

7. If you think the Vietnamese people at the nail salon are talking about you, that’s because they are.

8. No matter how crazy your kids make you and no matter how much they fight, when they are not home the silence will be deafening and you’ll miss them a lot.

9. When you are on a sugar-free diet and there is homemade wine in your refrigerator, it’s pretty much torture.

10. No really. Ironing totally stinks.

    Comments

  • Mrs4444


    The zit in the eyebrow–That's the worst! Sorry, but this cracked me up!

  • Jenn


    7. If you think the Vietnamese people at the nail salon are talking about you, that's because they are.

    I KNEW it.

    ps. Best wishes and safe travels to you and your ovary.

  • Bean


    Mo – I'm telling you, put Bragg's apple cider vinegar on your zit at night with a cotton swab! If it's really stubborn, put a little white toothpaste on it after the ACV dries. You can put the ACV on in the morning, too – with an already damp swab (to lessen the acidity) – and let dry.

    Look at the bright side – at least it's in your eyebrow!

    So true about the silence in house and missing.

  • Rachel


    I have nothing to say except that I can't wait to finally hug you.

  • Out-Numbered


    Damn girl. Sounds like you're living a tortured existence. Get off the diet, get rid of the dog and go find that other ovary. have fun at Blogher!

  • surprised mom


    Some of this is funny. Some of it, frustrating. All of it is true. That's why I love reading your blog.
    Have a blast at BlogHer!

  • The Devoted Dad


    That is so true about the zit thong. Even guys get those.
    I always worry about scratching the bumper when I take out the back row. Have fun on your trip. – Jason

  • The Devoted Dad


    Thing, not thong. 🙂

  • Bring Back Pluto


    You know what's the worst?

    Stepping in pee 5 days in a row, because your boys can't aim!

    Funny stuff!

    Yours,
    Bring Back Pluto
    "ONE of THE GUYS"
    Hope you'll visit.

  • newnorth


    number 4. HAHAhahaha

  • Sadia


    I don't iron, except finished cross stitch pieces. This means that my iron sees the light of day once a year or so.

    I love wrinkle-releasing spray, and the touch-up setting on my dryer!

  • Mike


    Ironing doesn't stink to the "domestic god" that I've been labeled (by my wife).

    By the way, what is this thing you refer to as "a diet?"

  • the planet of janet


    so… i've been weeping all over the internet tonight as i read post after post from my fave people who will be at blogher.

    and i wont.

    waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

  • Mum-me


    It's the ironing that is torture – any day of the year, hot or cold.

    Love the puppy-through-the-screen-to-get-the-mailman point.

  • WeaselMomma


    Next week you should be able to have a whole new list of RR IV with things like, If you give a blogger a cookie, they're going to want a glass of wine.

  • Kathy


    I got a BlogHer zit, too. Left of lip. Nice!

    Momo, I hope I see you there! Will send you a Twitter DM to give you my cell. Call me!

  • Lynn


    SO true about the kids…I can't function now without a minimum level of squabbling all the time.

    Have a great time at BlogHer!

  • DysFUNctional Mom


    I don't iron at all. I don't even own an iron. Does that mean I suck? Or I don't suck? I'm confused.

  • Debbie


    You are so funny! And I do NOT iron. What a waste of time:)

  • anya


    Number 8. Pathetically true.

  • Gertrude Groggins -


    #8 kills me! I spend insane amounts of time trying to get my son to quiet down. Then when he's gone to his dad's, I complain that it's too quiet. Of course my son thinks I'm crazy.

  • Tom


    This is why you have to con your husband or some other guy to install and remove car seats: no ovaries, no problem.

    Have fun and stay safe!

  • Jaina


    Oh have so much fun Momo!!! I wish I was going. I can't wait to hear all of the stories!

  • Oscar


    Wine beats all!

    Have fun!

  • Mrs. Schmitty


    So feel your pain regarding the zit (check out the pic on my blog) but I won't be going to BlogHer to show it off cause I'd have to purchase an extra plane ticket for it!!!

    Have a great time…hopefully next year I'll be able to go and meet ya!

  • AngelaBeth


    I'm leaving a comment on your blog because you are a popular mom-blogger and I am trying to get some info from moms! A lot of the moms I know, and babysitters too, don't know a going rate or what's acceptable to pay a babysitter. So, I'm doing a survey and posting results on my blog. If you would be so kind as to answer the simple ten questions that would be great! If you're feeling REALLY nice, forward this to your friends or blog about it. But it's ok it if you don't too. I just need lots of responses!

    http://angelabeth123.blogspot.com/2009/07/im-trying-to-get-all-fixings-together.html

  • Jason


    You know, I totally hate it when the back seat of the van hit's me in my ovary…

  • geeksinrome


    have a great time in Chicago!!

    too bad you'll be so self-conscious with everyone staring at your eyebrow now that you've outed yourself!

  • AlisonH


    I started to count the gasp, guffaw, gasp, guffaw sequence here. You sure the puppy wasn't just expressing the effects of the watermelon?

    And I had to laugh so hard at #2 because we once bought a (used) car during a drought year here in California, and four months later, driving through the desert across Utah of all places, we got hit by a massive downpour and I had no idea where the windshield wipers were–the windshield washers had always been broken, so I'd just never used the thing at all.

  • James (SeattleDad)


    That is why I don't iron. Buy wrinkle free.

  • KWG


    But won't the homemade wine make the ironing much more pleasurable?

    😉

  • Stacey


    I don't iron. I hang my clothes in the bathroom while I shower and pray for the steam to smooth the wrinkles out. Sometimes it works. And sometimes I look like a homeless person.

  • Heather


    Just so you know- I never even SAW the zit as I was hugging you!! *squees* more hugs later, I'm sure!

  • ♥georgie♥


    LMAO@7. If you think the Vietnamese people at the nail salon are talking about you, that's because they are.

    Hope you had a BLAST!!!! cant wait to hear all about it

  • meleah rebeccah


    I am CRACKING up. I think number seven was my favorite!

  • Momma


    So how do we get a loaner from Chevy? Preferably a hybrid!!! We are about to take a huge road trip…Ohio to Florida to North Carolina and back home to Ohio! I'd write a 1000 posts about it if that helps!

    Glad to hear that your trip was awesome and nice stack of meds there. I only have 5 bottles in my collection, but the medicine cabinet is full of leftover antibiotics and pain killers! (Just in case)

  • tanya25m


    No. 8 is so, so true….