The Dance

posted by Momo Fali on February 9, 2010

Almost every night, at roughly 9:30 PM, I fall asleep on the couch. My husband and I are usually in the middle of watching TV and let me just go ahead and say thank goodness for our DVR, or I would never know what the heck Jack Bauer is up to.

The lights are on in the living room, the television is loud, the dogs are playing and yelping at each other, the coffee table is leaving deep indentations in my calves and my laptop is burning a hole in my thighs. But, boy can I sleep! All I have to do is set my head at an extremely awkward angle so that when I wake I’ll barely be able to move my neck, and I am OUT.

Sometime between 10:00 and 11:00 my husband will tell me to go to bed, at which time I rub my eyes, mumble something about being “so tired”…you know, because it isn’t obvious…then head upstairs.

When I climb into bed I begin, what I refer to as, my ballet.

This little dance starts with me on my right side as I notice that my top pillow is too close to the edge of the mattress. Then the top pillow is too high in the back and too flat under my head. Then the bottom pillow has slid toward the back of the bed. I simply can not get comfortable.

I flip over to my left side and start again. Tossing, turning, fluffing, adjusting, and flipping over and over again. For real, it’s like Baryshnikov up in here.

Last night this went on for many minutes and when I finally got settled just so, I realized that I had forgotten to take off my socks.

One of these nights, I’m just going to stay on the couch.

    Comments

  • WeaselMomma


    Not a bad idea. You could also scoot up to bed earlier and watch TV there. You'll even get more bang for your buck out of the DVR.

  • Oscar


    What is it about couches and sofa's that make you so cozy, yet you are propped up, and tangled. Then you go to a device that is designed for sleep and you're uncomfortable. > go figure<

    I sleep with my socks on. My feet get cold!

  • ~ifer


    I am so glad I am not the only one who does that dance at night! In my case, add in the fact that I have restless leg syndrome, and you are in for quite the performance!

  • Tara R.


    Ah… the Insomnia Ballet… I know it well. I sleep with sock on too.

  • surprised mom


    What did Tara call it? Ah, yes, the Insomnia Ballet. Yes, I can relate, except I first fall asleep in the recliner, then I go upstairs and do my dance. And, if I'm really "lucky" I do get a touch of restless leg syndrome. And sleep is supposed to be relaxing? No wonder half the people I know just wake up tired. As for socks, yes I wear them. It's gets a tad nippy at night.

  • Deb


    –>I'm in a constant race to fall asleep before my husband comes in and starts snoring on his First breath. UGH.

    http://www.WebSavvyMom.com

  • UP


    I have sleep apnea, my ballet finds me wrapped up in a tube pumping air into my throat. The mast is soooooo sexy, and the thrasing is sooooo annoying. They say it's helping…just not so sure!

    UP

  • Debbie


    I know exactly what you mean! Why is it we can sleep soundly in bizarre places but not in our own beds?

  • Kori


    I am so lucky-when I sleep, I can sleep anywhere and I LOVE my bed. I only fall asleep on my couch on a weekend day when there is a football game on, that's like a sleeping pill to me. I just go to be at 9:00 and read, and before oyu know it, Steve is coming to bed and taking my glasses off for me. But for me, it is an either/or thing: if I am going to sleep that night, I can sleep anywhere. If I am going to have a bad night, it doesn't matter WHAT I try.

  • Heather


    I'm with Kori. I usually do pretty well no matter WHERE I sleep, but if it's going to be one of those nights where I'm not sleeping? It doesn't matter WHERE I try, it's not happening.

  • anya


    You sound just like my toddler! Able to sleep in awkward positions anytime, anywhere, including face first in a bowl of pasta, but when it comes to bedtime…fugetaboutit. Conditions have to be EXACT: water, teddy, blankie, story, kisses and snuggles…the list is detailed and very long. Kills me.

  • Jana


    why is that? I do it too! the couch isnt even that comfortable but the walking after sleeping ruins it for me every time. I had to giggle out loud with this one.

  • Amy


    I think you just need a snuggle. 😉

  • Maureen


    Ha! Well you see, you forgot the laptop… perhaps you need those burning thighs to fall asleep to. 😉

  • meleah rebeccah


    And I was just going to say, why dont you just sleep on the couch!

    PS:
    I have to sleep with socks OFF too!

  • James (SeattleDad)


    Just another sign of aging, giving up and sleeping on the couch. I am fighting the temptation too.

  • Otter Thomas


    After having a kid I have actually fallen asleep during Razorback games. I would have thought that completely impossible before children.

  • Deb


    I have been there. Stay on the couch. Of course, with a 14-month-old who doesn't sleep much (at night, anyway), I could sleep on rocks and be happy. But I remember those drooling evenings on the couch. Don't let go of them!!

  • Jaina


    That made me tired just thinking about it.

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