Random Realizations: Travel Edition

posted by Momo Fali on August 16, 2010

1. If you spend 13 days in five different cities (and six different beds), you will grow very weary of checking for bedbugs.

2. Manhattan in August is hot, dirty and smells a lot like pee.

3. The Eastern Shore of Virginia in August is hot, sandy and smells a lot like fish.

4. But, that smell is totally worth it when your brother-in-law takes your husband and kids fishing and they come home with fresh crab and flounder for dinner.

5. Busch Gardens Williamsburg is ridiculously expensive. Nine bucks for four mozzarella sticks and a cup of strawberries for the kids’ snack, on top of $55.00 admission tickets and $18.00 parking IS. JUST. WRONG.

6. If you buy a hotel room through Priceline, apparently the staff doesn’t have to guarantee you a room at their hotel…but rather, any room at any hotel. This means you might end up booking at a Hyatt and end up at a Quality Inn.

7. And, you might take your Ambien in the parking lot of the Hyatt just before you (think you’re going to) check-in, only to be told you have to drive 10 miles, through the completely foreign city of Pittsburgh, all while arguing with the staff and watching people who arrived AFTER you get a room because they’re paying full price.

8. You will never use Priceline or stay at a Hyatt again.

9. Then you will use your blog for evil paybacks. Mwah ha ha!!

10. The speed limit in West Virginia through the Allegheny Mountains is 70mph. This is also referred to as the “place where Momo gets itchy armpits and yells at her husband a lot”.

11. After non-stop travel to points in West Virginia, Virginia, Pennsylvania, New York, and almost Maryland…Ohio will never seem so good.

12. Because that is where your bed is.

13. And you don’t have to check for any bugs.

    Comments

  • WebSavvyMom


    –>We head to the Eastern Shore in October for Oysterfest. It's much cooler at that time of the year. As for Busch Gardens in W'burg, we drive by it every time we leave Va. Beach for the weekend and I hate the traffic on 64. The last time we went and took two kids, we packed lunches, sodas, water AND BEER and left it in the car in a cooler. Then we went out mid-day, ate, DRANK and then went back in for the afternoon. I agree, the prices are ridiculous!
    ~deb

  • WeaselMomma


    You sure have been out for lots of adventures!

  • Hockeymandad


    Based on your number 5 comment, don't come to Orlando theme parks unless you can swindle a resident's discount. Seriously.

  • Tara R.


    Priceline is dead to me…

    As cliche as it sounds, you need a vacation from your vacation.

  • Dawn


    But aren't the Allegheny Mountains in WV just gorgeous? 🙂 I'm from WV, but live in flat IL now (have since '97). When we go back 'home' I get nervous when my husband drives too fast over all of those hills. It used to not phase me, but now, I'm a mess!

    Three years ago, we visited Busch Gardens on our way home from the Outer Banks. It was hotter than Hades that day and not very enjoyable.

  • Heather


    you poor girl! i have heard that about priceline and will remember that next time i am booking a vaca for sure!

  • Lynn @ Walking With Scissors


    Wait. You ATE Flounder? I may never forgive you! You'd better watch your back because I'm pretty sure you don't want to mess with The Little Mermaid that way. She'll cut you.

  • Smart A$$ Mom


    um, and you forgot that you left Ohio and CEDAR FREGGIN POINT for the failure of BUSCH GARDENS. There is. no comparison.

  • MommyTime


    UGH. The non-guarantee guarantees drive me crazy. If you really want revenge, you need to make every mention of those companies a link, so that people Googling for Priceline and Hyatt are much more likely to get this post. muwhahahaha… I can be evil too. 😉

  • Aimee Greeblemonkey


    14. Momofali and Greeblemonkey have matching glasses!

  • UP


    I love the interstate in West Virginia…speedy, scary, and pretty!

    I hate looking for bed bugs too!

    And Ohio is where I'll be at the end of the month!

    UP

  • meleah rebeccah


    Welcome Home!!

  • Amie


    Manhattan smells like pee (or worse) pretty much year-round…

    Re: Priceline, I'd call and complain (1-800-PRICELINE). Their "Quality Experience Guarantee" promises:
    – Your hotel will be confirmed for the dates, area, and star level that you agreed to (or higher star level).
    – Your reservation will be immediately entered into the hotel's own central reservation system.

  • ZDub


    You know what else sucks about Priceline? If you use them to book a hotel in Burbank (Holiday Inn) and your room smells like smoke/jizz/cat pee and there is hair on your alleged clean sheets, you won't get a different room or your money back because Eff! You used Priceline! Sorry! Piss off!

    Trust me, I speak from experience.

    P.S. This post made me laugh. But I'm sorry. Seriously.

  • Jill


    So I think it's fairly established that Priceline sucks.

    But having your own bed to go home to… as a nomad right now with NO place to call home … yeah, I'm jealous.

  • The Urban Cowboy


    Didn't know that about Priceline…but than again, I'm too lazy to try to get a better deal.

  • AlisonH


    Welcome home!

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