Fall Funk

posted by Momo Fali on October 18, 2013

You know how it goes. Work, cook, clean, eat, laundry. Work, cook, clean, eat, laundry. Shall I continue? No? It gets OLD, doesn’t it?

The point is, before you know it a week has passed and you haven’t posted anything on your blog. But, if history repeats itself I’ll be posting every day in November so you have that to look forward to. Though, come mid-month your feelings may lean toward the last sentence of that first paragraph.

I’m really starting to feel the funk of fall, which doesn’t help matters. Though, it’s okay because I’m combating it by eating more cookies. We are working out more, but our trainer’s favorite word is “nutrition” and I keep telling him my favorite word is “beer.” He doesn’t listen. He tells me to do more lunges and eat kale, but instead I watch House Hunters and inhale Kettle Chips.

Sure the sky is blue and the leaves are gorgeous, but I know what’s coming and my psycho psychic mind is telling me it’s going to be a nasty winter. It’s going to be cold. Yes, winter usually is cold, but I’m telling you it’s going to be exceptionally cold because I’m a walking Farmer’s Almanac, so I KNOW these things. At least we just spent $5,000 on a new furnace, so we have that going for us.

I try to fool myself by saying things like, “Mmm…this cup of tea is so soothing” or “Doesn’t the cinnamon apple cake smell delicious?” except I don’t bake. I do have a cinnamon apple cake candle, though. Basically there are attempts being made at mind tricks, but I’m trying to trick myself. The only time my mind tricks work on me is when I say, “I’m JUST going to Target to get toilet paper.”

I find myself taking increasingly long, scalding-hot showers and so do my kids, because we are trying to get the chill OUT OF OUR BONES. My husband doesn’t understand this, because while we are joyously inhaling steam all he can do is yell, “No one needs a 25 minute-long shower!” Which you probably don’t if you’re a bear like him.

In preparation for winter’s wrath I’ve been taking extra Vitamin D, which is supposed to help the immune system. My son’s new school doesn’t have any windows. NONE. There is one lonely skylight over the indoor playground, but that’s it. So, he has to take extra, extra Vitamin D because apparently parents aren’t allowed to get on the roof with a chainsaw and create more skylights; which is a dumb rule, because it’s FOR THE CHILDREN.

The solution to my lack of posting and fall-funk is probably to buy more fuzzy socks and take naps. Except I have insomnia, so I’ll need more fuzzy socks to offset the lack of sleep. Or nail polish and a new lamp. Oh, or a bedspread! Or very warm, footie pajamas. Or new boots…

Gotta go. I need to head to Target to pick up some toilet paper.

    Comments

  • Shannon


    My warm sock problem is out of control. I actually made my mother tell me that I was not allowed to buy any more. Because THAT always works.

  • Momo Fali


    My husband wishes it were that easy.

  • Arnebya


    I believe the Almanac, I do. I am already searching for the perfect boot. And snow boots. And coats. And sweaters (haaaaaaaaaa I am ahead on this one since I never put my sweaters away during the summer because alwayscold). And hats and matching gloves, of which I lose one each year, usually the same damn hand so I can’t even have a mismatched pair each year. And the funk. The funk is trying to get me and I’m all you ain’t REAL funk, you don’t even know who George Clinton is, back up, but the funk is trying to take hold regardless and I hate it. I HATE IT. I wear scarves in the house which pisses my husband off because he’s in a t-shirt. And I want plastic on the windows because I feel a breeze and didn’t we just have these replaced but apparently plastic is tacky and ghetto and we are neither of those things (anymore? because I remember some winters past when PLASTIC). I’m trying with the tea and the sweaters and the fuzzy socks but when I leave for work it’s still dark and it’s chilly and the dark and chill are ungood for my mental issues I don’t want to call issues because it sounds so accepting of the issues. I’m wrapped in a sweater and blanket at work wondering why they don’t just buy me an office Snuggie already and why is the laundry neverending.

    • Momo Fali


      You and me? We’re funk sisters.

  • Colleen


    Studies show that retail therapy (even if you’re just buying toilet paper) boosts your mood by 500%. It’s totally true – I read it on the internet. 🙂

    • Momo Fali


      I believe. I believe!

  • Kari


    OMG I feel this with every bit of my being.
    Winter is coming.
    Every summer I kid myself into believing that winter won’t happen this year.
    Or that I will win the lottery and move to my summer home in Spain.
    Where it is NEVER WINTER.
    I raise my stupid Vitamin D pill in your general direction, soul sistah.

    • Momo Fali


      Cheers.

  • tracy@sellabitmum


    I put my Uggs on yesterday – and I don’t think I’ll take them off until May.

  • meeshie


    I’m trying to figure out how to breast feed while wearing a snuggie this winter. 😉

  • Anna Hettick


    I love fall but I hear ya. I like when the days are still sunny and warmish crisp and the nights are just cold enough that I want socks and possibly an extra blanket….both the socks and extra blanket will be thrown across the room sometime in the middle of the night because I’ll be hot…but needing to take hot showers and add several blankets and two pairs of socks….no thank you. Not looking forward to it at all!

  • Melisa


    I’m sorry; I got stuck on the paragraph about how you are considering NaBloPoMo.

  • Laura In Little Rock


    I’m glad the heat is breaking, but I’m not ready to need to turn on the headlights to drive to work and then turn them back on to drive home. I’m an every window-wide-open kind of person. My husband would say I’m a leave-every-light-burning kind of person.

  • Meleah Rebeccah


    I’ve been feeling the fall funk too. I think I’m going to take your suggestion and “pick up some toilet paper from Target” to lift my spirits.

  • CyndyBush


    Pretty much the ONLY thing I like about cold weather is the pretty, comfy clothes that go along with it and the excuse to buy more of them.

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