House Hunters Anonymous

posted by Momo Fali on October 29, 2013

Shh. Don’t tell anyone, but sometimes I like to be alone. Sure I work alone, but I “talk” on social media all day and when my kids come home from school there is rarely a moment without chatter.

Don’t get me wrong; I love people and socializing, and talking – oh, can I talk – but at the end of the day I like to climb into bed and fold the adjustable mattress into what my husband calls “the taco” and relax. It’s safe and quiet there. There’s nobody asking for help with homework or telling me they’re out of underwear. I can’t even see the dirty dishes!

I know some people frown on having a television in the bedroom, but not me. I have always watched TV in bed, ever since I was little and I’d fall asleep to the Donny and Marie show. When I got older, it was Johnny Carson and when he retired I moved on to Cheers reruns. Lately, I’ve been tuning in to old episodes of Seinfeld. It’s just me, my bed and some good comedy.

See the correlation there? At the end of the day, when I’m trying to wind down and relax, I like to laugh.

The only problem is that since the kids went back to school I’ve started climbing into bed around 10:00 so I can get up earlier. There is nothing funny on at 10:00. There are news programs, reruns of murder mysteries and reality shows that aren’t fit for watching just before you close your eyes. *shudder*

This is why I’m currently addicted to House Hunters on HGTV.

My husband thinks I watch it because I want granite counter-tops, a soaking tub, and a double vanity – and I do, but more than that I enjoy the schadenfreude of watching couples bicker over linoleum and west-facing windows. Sometimes, people don’t buy houses just because of the color of the walls. You know, painting is hard.

Though it isn’t billed as a comedy, I find humor in the expectations of first-time home buyers and the commentary of their frustrated realtors who gently tiptoe around the fact that their clients are nit-picky. Brass fixtures, overhead fans, or GASP, wood paneling? Deal breakers!

Maybe it makes me feel better about the chimney, hot water heater, and furnace we recently had to replace. Maybe it makes me think that our carpet isn’t nearly as gross as it could be. Or maybe it makes me thankful that I no longer work in mortgage lending.

Either way, thank you House Hunters for the laughter and the sweet dreams. And, may I never need to go house hunting again.

    Comments

  • Bree


    Me too! I often turn to Friends reruns, they seem to always be on and it’s the ONLY show I can watch more than once. Probably because it’s hard to discern each episode, but whatever. I also have a DVR, yes, a DVR and will record my favorites and watch them. I totally understand….it’s a little mini-vacay before we close our eyes and all the days events blur into a long term memory 🙂

  • Mama D


    House Hunters makes us laugh too. And it has shown me that I have nowhere near enough patience to be a realtor!!

  • Melisa


    Bed + TV = Heaven

    That show cracks me up, too!

  • Casey


    We don’t have cable, but every time we’re on vacation, I end up watching way too much of that show. It’s awesome. I watched Island Hunters in Atlanta a few weeks ago for hours.

  • Jamie


    I could be a charter member. For about two years, I’ve been hooked on HGTV. I get so bummed when there is a new House Hunters International and it’s on at 10:30. Either I go to bed and miss it. Or stay up and watch till 11.

    • Momo


      International fascinates me. I can’t believe the tiny spaces people live in, or the ruins, or the sweeping landscapes that make me long to live in Italy.

  • tara


    Okay, I am one of those people that absolutely can’t have a TV in the bedroom, but it’s because I can’t fall asleep with it on. My husband can, and then I basically just stay awake waiting for him to fall asleep so I can turn it off, or I watch TV until 3am.

    Also, WTF is it with scary TV shows on at 10pm?? When I lived alone, I used to watch CSI or Without a Trace and never fall asleep because I have an active imagination and convince myself someone’s going to kill me.

    House Hunters is the way to go! Especially when I get to make fun of them for choosing the wrong house 🙂

    • Momo


      They ALWAYS pick the wrong house!

  • Millicent


    OH my goodness!!! I have been watching this show lately and can’t get enough! There was a mini-marathon on Saturday and I was glued to the tv. I hide in my room and pretend to fold laundry so that no one will bother me (they don’t want to chance getting pulled in to help!).

  • AlisonH


    Can I make a request? If you’re ever hospitalized, give the nurses explicit permission to turn the TV off after you’re asleep.

    I had a hospital roommate who kept hers on all night, flickering in my eyes. When I begged the nurse for mercy, she told me, “She has a right to have it on.” Yeah, but…!

    Wait. She had an idea.

    She went out and came back in without ever turning the light on in the room, and I felt rubber bands going behind my ears: she’d jury-rigged something.

    Which is why Grand Rounds happened while I slept clear through it in the morning, those young male doctors I’d come to know well by that point while I slept with a feminine pad across my face.

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