Posts Filed Under Ramblings

This is Not Child’s Play

posted by Momo Fali on May 29, 2013

“Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.”
– Albert Camus

Right now, we’re playing a giant game of pin the tail on the donkey, what with the being blindfolded, sent spinning, then pushed off into the unknown. If we could just get that tail on the donkey’s butt, everything would be fine! You thought you were playing a child’s party game, but it’s really a metaphor for my life.

These games used to be fun and exciting, but now they’re exhausting. I just did the egg-toss and have raw yolk all over me. I HAVE A BELLY FULL OF PUNCH AND CAKE. STOP SPINNING ME. TAKE THIS BLINDFOLD OFF. I want to see where I’m going and I want to stick this pin squarely where it belongs, then wash the egg off my shirt. I want normal!

But, see? There’s no such thing.

At least, not for us. Maybe for you and your family, but not mine. YOU try to get the tail on the donkey and I will, instead, focus on making sure that my kin don’t spin themselves into traffic, or pin themselves in the face, or fall off that cliff over there. You try to win the candy prize and I’ll try to keep my family from being admitted to the hospital. Deal?

And, sometimes I think it’s not fair; watching everyone scramble for bubble gum while I sit there, rubbing my face where I got whacked with the pinata stick. But, other times I sneak into my kids’ rooms at night and see them sleeping soundly, each holding a piece of rainbow-colored, papier mache. I hope they know that, although mom didn’t get the prize, she took a hard hit to the cheek in order to get us close to it.

Hopefully I will teach them that at the end of the day, life isn’t about the party favors, it’s about the clean-up and knowing that despite the mess, you will do it again. That sometimes you will have hopes of fun and normalcy that turn to shambles, but you pick up the trash and move on.

Please excuse me while I get my broom.

For the 3/25

posted by Momo Fali on May 27, 2013

On Wednesday, August 3, 2005, Columbus-based Lima Company Marine Unit lost 14 men to a roadside bomb just outside of Haditha, Iraq. I don’t remember if we got the news about the bombing on Wednesday or Thursday, but I know there was a period of time when we were anxiously awaiting word that our nephew, Erik, was not among the dead.

I don’t know how to describe the feelings of relief mixed with sadness when we heard Erik was alive. When he got back to Ohio that fall, I cried every time I saw him, because I knew many of his friends made a very different trip home. I was so grateful, that I was literally a sobbing mess every time he walked into a room.

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I saved this newspaper and keep it in a drawer where I come across it often. Someday I’ll give it to Erik, if he wants it, though I’m sure he recalls that day without any physical reminders. I can’t imagine what he saw, what he still sees, or if he can even talk about it. I know that this paper, the one I held in my hands when the grief was raw, reminds me that it happened and we were very, very scared.

And, it reminds me to be thankful that Erik, his brother Mike, our nephew Alex, and our friend Jeremy have all come home alive in the last few years. I saw Erik and Mike on Saturday. We hugged, talked, laughedplayed drinking games, poker, and a seriously competitive game of Taboo. I am incredibly proud to be their aunt even if they won’t let me win.

For all the families who are remembering their fallen this Memorial Day, thank you for sharing your sons and daughters with us. Their sacrifice, and yours, are not forgotten.

Happy Holiday (in May)!

posted by Momo Fali on May 21, 2013

If you’re a long-time reader, you may recall that I don’t make very pretty desserts. I may put my heart and soul into baking you a cake, but they look like they contain my blood, sweat, and tears.

Recently, we were asked to bring a patriotic dessert to a pot-luck so I turned to Pinterest for some inspiration. Part of my job is to pin items to the BlogHer Loves Holidays board and I knew there were some great ideas involving red, white and blue goodies. In particular, I wanted to make these rice cereal treats.

They didn’t turn out as pretty as the picture, but it’s me; this wasn’t a surprise. It wasn’t until we got to the pot-luck where I saw these adorably sprinkled cupcakes…

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 …and this flag-waving dessert…

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 …that I realized I had gone overboard on the dye and created the ugliest dish on the table. They weren’t even blue. They were green and very holiday-buffet looking. This is now my M.O. as I once created, what my friends refer to as, “Holiday S’mores” on a camping trip when I accidentally packed cinnamon graham crackers.

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I used a 3-section foam plate as a tray, so as not to intimidate anyone.

At this most recent event, people were nudging me as I took these pictures to point out how bad the treats looked. In their defense, they didn’t know they were talking to the chef.

Next up: I put a Christmas spin on strawberry shortcake.

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Siri-ously Impolite

posted by Momo Fali on May 17, 2013

I don’t text and drive, not because it’s illegal, but because it’s really dumb. I occasionally read texts at stoplights, but that’s only because I am frequently parked at one particular light which lasts two full minutes.

That doesn’t seem very long, until you’re actually sitting there. It’s long. Last week, I applied all of my makeup while sitting at that light. I even curled my eyelashes. Don’t judge me.

If a text is urgent I will reply using Siri (yes Mom, texts can be urgent when you work on Twitter and you have a tweet about quilting about to go up in the middle of a national disaster…and, this is not to say that quilting isn’t important, because it is…to quilters).

Sometimes, though, Siri doesn’t cooperate. In fact, she’s taken to insulting me.

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So I told my daughter to snap a picture of the screen so I could tattle on my iPhone like any adult would do, then I tried again.

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Rude.

Clearly, Siri has selective hearing which makes her a lot like my children. And, my dog. I may as well ask her to clean her room, or unload the dishwasher, or stop rolling in dead animals.

But I will not cave. I will not text while driving even though I kind of want to just to show Siri that I CAN LIVE WITHOUT HER and her lack of help.

At least the quilters are happy.