1. You may begin your Memorial Day weekend with fond remembrance, thanks for our military and high hopes for three beautiful days with your family.

2. But, then you will pick up your kids after school on Friday, go to the grocery store and end up yelling at them in the middle of the frozen foods aisle because they are bickering over a shopping cart.

3. And, you’re only 10 minutes in to the weekend.

4. On Saturday, the weeks of rain may give way to sunshine and warmer weather. Sweltering, even.

5. Which leads the mosquitoes to say, “Mmm…LUNCH!”

6. Which is what your dog might say when she finds a dead rabbit in the park.

7. And a dead squirrel in the road.

8. Then your son might use his face to stop a skateboard.

9. But, gigantic S’mores make it all better.

10. Until the neighbor’s dog wags her huge tail right into your son’s marshmallow.

11.  To finish your weekend, you may attend a party at which you judge each others alcoholic drinks. Lots of alcoholic drinks.

12. Then you realize that you’re a schmuck when it comes to throwing parties because the hostess serves more hamburger toppings than you make for a whole meal.

13. And, the next day…after all of those drinks…seeing a picture of sauerkraut and sauteed mushrooms is enough to make you never want a burger again.

Tomorrow is your birthday.  It’s hard for me to wrap my head around the fact that you’ve been in my life for less than a decade, because it feels like you’ve been around forever.  Most people say that they can’t believe how time flies, but with you things tend to move at a slower pace.

We have been through a lot together, you and I.  I won’t lie; you’re the reason I have an intimate relationship with anti-anxiety meds and sleep aides.  You are the reason I throw my hands in the air on a daily basis, look up and say, “Lord, have mercy on me.”

I had a hard time learning to love you.  I was scared to love you.  I didn’t think you were going to stick around very long and I didn’t want to get hurt.  I’m glad I let my guard down.  It was the best thing I ever did and I learned that, when in doubt, you should follow your heart.

You bring adventure to my life because I never know what you’re going to say or what you’re going to do.  Even when we’re out running errands together, I feel like I’m living on the edge.  At least I never have to worry about life being dull.

But, I don’t just love you because you keep me on my toes.  I love you because you are strong, smart, funny and so stinkin’ cute.  I love that you aren’t perfect, because it reminds me that no one is.

Happy 9th birthday, Boo.  Mommy loves you.

April is a scary month.

Oh, sorry…let me clarify.  April is a scary month for my husband when he sees our bills.  April is when I redecorate.

When the sun finally comes back to Ohio after months of teasing us with the whole, I’ll come out, but only for a minute once a week thing, I get the urge to buy new towels.  I blame the lack of vitamin D.

But, it’s not just new towels.  I start refinishing furniture and painting walls, which leads to needing new rugs, then new pictures, and oh my, those candles don’t even match anymore!

I have lugged an armoire up the stairs and a treadmill down them.  My king-sized bed has been bounced around like a ball.  I hang blinds, buy new pillows and change cabinet hardware.  I pack stuff into boxes, store it in the basement, then revisit the boxes I packed the year before.  If the items fit into my new scheme, I pull them out.  If they don’t, then I try again next year.

Come April, changing things around becomes the only thing I think about.  If only it would translate to my eating habits and exercise routine because I’m pretty sure that wearing shorts would make me happier than having a whitewashed coffee table.

Then I wouldn’t scare my husband with the bills or when I get ready for bed.

I finally got a new phone yesterday.

As much as it pained me to give up my Blackberry, I was growing tired of having to remove the battery and reinstall it every time I wanted to check my email.  Plus, on Saturday I got out of the car with my hands full and dropped it on the driveway.  Then I stepped on it.  I wear a size 11 shoe.  Enough said.

After spending over two hours at the phone store yesterday, my husband and I left with brand new Droids.  On a related note:  If anyone wants to help me set up my four email accounts, there’s a doughnut in it for you.

Our kids had been more than patient while we were choosing phones and getting things changed over.  As a reward, we decided to let our son have one of the old Blackberries, so he could still play games and take pictures.

I thought he would be more interested in Hangman, but he started snapping pictures left and right.  Inside the car, in the driveway, photos of the dog’s tail, my shoes, his football.  You name it, he took a picture of it.

But it wasn’t long before I realized he isn’t so much a photographer as he is a typical boy, because when I was reading my new phone manual I looked up to see him taking pictures of his own butt.