Archive for December, 2011

Clutter, Clutter, Everywhere

posted by Momo Fali on December 11, 2011

The other day, me, my friend Bean and our two families were talking about getting together. We were going to go to Bean’s house.

She said, “If you come over, you need to know that my house is a mess. There is clutter everywhere.”

I assured her, that I completely understood, but I don’t think she believed me. I’m here to tell her that she’s not alone. Here’s why…

This is my dining room table. Also, you should know that we recently ATE at this table while this massive pile sat with us. I had to do a two-armed swoop to push everything to one side, because the only other place to sit is our breakfast nook and that space doesn’t look any better.

Let’s take a closer look, shall we?

1. Lots of socks, because my husband has started doing the laundry and he won’t cart them around like I do. Now, they include one baseball and one softball sock from the games that were played IN JULY.

2. Two first aid kits.

3. Golf balls in a Santa bag.

4. Two mini water bottles.

5. Last week’s clean laundry; some thrown over chairs, some folded, but for goodness sake, NOT PUT AWAY.

6. A coverless book called Magic Eye II.

7. Buried under the book is a stuffed reindeer named Comet.

8. Buried under all of it is a homework assignment. Lucky, for us, it was from three weeks ago.

9. And, the white thing that looks like a tablecloth, is actually the table pad from Thanksgiving dinner.

Stay tuned for next time, when I make Bean feel even better about her house when I post a picture of my kitchen counter!

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I Worry About Algebra

posted by Momo Fali on December 7, 2011

My daughter brought home a poem today that she wrote about herself.

I am energetic and creative.

I wonder how many stars there are.

I hear the wind blowing.

I see the sun glowing.

I want to travel the world.

I am energetic and creative.

I pretend to always know what I’m talking about.

I touch the grass.

I worry about money.

I say God Bless America.

I dream of going to Stanford.

I hope to have a good future.

I am energetic and creative.

From this I can gather three things of which I was not previously aware. First, when she says, “I know what I’m talking about” I will no longer believe her and, second, we need to not discuss money problems in front of the kids.

Third, my heart broke a little when she said, “…Stanford.” I have never imagined her anywhere but right here, at Ohio State.

Because if she leaves town in six years, who the heck is going to help her brother with his 9th grade math homework?

Washin’ it Here, Boss

posted by Momo Fali on December 5, 2011

I can’t believe I’m going to say this…

My husband started doing the laundry.

For the past 16 years, I have been in charge of washing, drying, folding and putting away the mountain of clothing, sheets and towels that our family creates. My husband once calculated, between our two dogs, how many piles of poo he had picked up; just so you know, it was about 12,000. I figure that I have turned, at least, that many socks right-side-out.

But, between work, blogging, cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping, my kids’ extra-curricular activities and my over-use of commas, I have been falling behind. My husband could only go out and buy new underwear so many times before he stepped in and took it over.

Yesterday morning, he announced, “There’s a new sheriff in town” and he started sorting clothes.

His first job was to empty the washer of the jeans and sweatshirts which had been rotting in there for a few days. Holla! He took a whiff, deemed them fine, then threw them in the dryer. After which, I opened the dryer door, smelled a pair of my son’s pants, gagged and put them all back in the washing machine to be cleaned again.

So, the start wasn’t smooth, but by the sounds of his yelling at the kids, “I’m emptying your pockets this time, but I won’t be doing it again!” I think he’s getting the hang of it. So far, he’s only shrunk two pairs of my pants.

Sure, they look like capris now, but at least they’re clean.

 

Speaking of laundry…you have one more day to enter the $50 Visa gift card giveaway from BlogHer and Bounce!

Third Grade Homework Can Be Messy

posted by Momo Fali on December 2, 2011

I felt the need to tell my son that, no matter what the problem,

“Sharts” are never the answer.