I am a Parent

posted by Momo Fali on January 23, 2013

Sometimes, after I have yelled and hit my head against the wall in frustration, I look at your face and count your freckles.

When I am too tired to keep my eyes open at night, I stumble past the cluttered coffee table and nearly burst into tears at the sight of the kitchen sink. I see that you’ve used four different cups in the last four hours, then I sneak into your room and give you kisses while you sleep.

I sigh at your attitude and 10 minutes later I grab you for a hug. My shoulders slump when I see your mountain of laundry on the basement floor, but as I fold your shirts I smile at how much you’ve grown.

I want to stomp my feet because it’s impossible to get you to bed on time, and in the morning I am happy to hear your footsteps when you climb out of bed and I know we’re about to start another day together.

This job – this blessing – it is work and happiness and exhaustion and sunshine. It is tears, sleepless nights, worry-filled days, and joy beyond compare. It’s being thrilled for how far you’ve come and being frozen in fear when I think about the future.

I am proud, I am scared, I am confident, I am confused.

I am a parent.

    Comments

  • Felicity


    This is so beautiful. It’s always the kitchen and laundry! No freckles on mine so I count curls. Thank you for sharing this. I enjoyed it. Probably more than in the day since mine are down and could get through it in one sitting!

    • Momo Fali


      It took me a half hour yesterday to respond to an email. I had to type about two sentences, but I was interrupted about 20 times.

  • Paula


    Love this! I live this! I thought I was the only one .

    Thank you!

    • Momo Fali


      Solidarity!

  • Jamie@SouthMainMuse


    ” nearly burst into tears at the sight of the kitchen sink.” I do burst into tears sometimes after walking into the kitchen. I have stayed home from church (and would probably every Sunday) to clean the kitchen. The thought of coming home to start my Sunday afternoon cleaning the kitchen makes me cry. It’s good to know I’m not alone. And good to be reminded that the little messers won’t be with me forever.

  • mare


    Perfect. Every mom can relate.

  • Arnebya


    I don’t nearly burst into tears at the sight of the sink or the laundry pile, but I do nearly (and sometimes completely) burst into COME THE F*CK ON! And yes, at 10:00 I am rolling my eyes that she is still not in the bed and at 10:20 when I no longer hear her moving around I want to go up and stare at her. When she’s still in the bathroom 30 minutes after going in, my level of COME THE F*CK ON shoots through the roof but the minute she emerges I want to ask if she needs more anything. Stop talking. Please stop talking, COME THE F*CK ON WHY ARE YOU STIIIIIIIIIIIILL TALKING. And then when I notice the quiet, that she’s stopped talking, I’m seeking her out to talk about mundane things because the silence from her voice no longer being there is excruciating, please don’t leave me.

  • Megan


    Just perfect. Thank you for making my day, reminding me of how my son drives me crazy yet makes my heart burst with love. It’s not easy being a partent of a teen.

    • Momo Fali


      Don’t discriminate, Megan! It’s not easy being a parent. Period. ;)

  • Anna Hettick


    Love this. It’s absolutely perfect.

  • Liz


    Totally frame-worthy!

  • tara


    So sweet, Momo! Your kids are so lucky to have you as their parent!

  • Wenderly


    Brilliant. *wiping tears*

  • Liz


    Beautiful post.

  • vicki


    Amen sister, amen!

  • Toni


    Thanks for your words that always remind me what is really important! XO

  • Melisa


    Beautifully written! Brava!

  • tracy@sellabitmum


    Um yes, yes and yes.

  • Jenny Fuller


    “…it is work and happiness and exhaustion and sunshine.” So well-put. Thanks for the reminder!

  • Julia


    I love this and it is so true how parenting is from one extreme to the next. Lovely .

  • meleah rebeccah


    Oh!!! I love every single word in this post!!

  • Jennifer @ Conversion Diary


    This post brought tears to my eyes (especially the comment about bedtime, as we begin our own nightly battle over here). :) Just discovered your blog and can’t wait to read more!

  • Pedro


    Know what? I think you need a masculine voice on your comments…
    Love this post

  • Trackbacks

  • Trackback from 2013 Year in Review - Momo Fali's
    Monday, 30 December, 2013

    […] – I reflected on parenting and how impossible and beautiful it can be at the same time. Oh, and I can’t forget that […]

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